Theodore Roosevelt

Alternative title: THAT'S What I'm Talkin' About

I have never seen anything like this, the badlands of western North Dakota. I drove the loop road of the park, stopping at the various scenes and hiking some trails. Then I camped out on the grassy plains with the (annoying) prairie dogs and bufallo. Here are some pics.





The above might have been the most amazing view I've ever seen; I don't know whether the photo does it justice. The river is about 500 feet below and 500 feet away at its closest. There are deer and wild horses drinking from the top part of the river, but they are just specks in this pic. Also note the great looking guy in the foreground.


I know you're all thinking, "Awww, how cute." But they are annoying little buggers.


Bison can be dangerous when startled. I was holding my breath while this bull ambled by.


My right ankle has had two severe sprains, not including this recent (mild) one. It's still sore, but I think it normally looks like that these days. The blister on the big toe, though, shouldn't be there.


Sunrise over my campsite.

One comment: there are lots of prairie dogs and lots of rabbits. The prairie dogs are smart and the rabbits are extremely stupid. When you walk on a trail, the prairie dogs scurry out of your way and then bark at you. The rabbits hop a few steps along the trail in front of you, wait for you to get closer, and then repeat several times before finally jumping to the side. When you drive, the prairie dogs in the road scurry out of the way of your car. The rabbits run ahead of the car and then have a 50% of turning off the road and a 50% chance of running into the road right in front of the oncoming car. Idiots.

Salem Sue

Before going to bed last night, I read about Salem Sue, the world's largest dairy cow. Salem Sue resides in New Salem, North Dakota, and stands 40 feet tall. That's right, an absolute monster of a cow taller than a telephone pole at the shoulder and God knows how long. It goes without saying that sleep was impossible, as whenever I closed my eyes, I was terrorized with visions of this unholy demon of the plains, wreaking havoc on the poor townsfolk, setting things on fire, plundering their goods, and harassing their livestock.

Unfortunately, between where I was staying in Bismarck, ND, and where I was going, T.R. National Park, was New Salem. There was no way around it; I either had to risk certain death at the jaws of Salem Sue, or give up on my trip and head back home, defeated, with my head hanging in shameful cowardice.

At sunrise, the lack of sleep gave me a certain perverse bravery, and I set off toward the town of New Salem. It was about fifty miles away, so I had time to ponder my fate. Was Salem Sue the type to kill quickly and with mercy, perhaps decapitating me with her evil cud-chewing molars? Or was she truly evil incarnate, the type who would trample my limbs with her massive cloven hooves and keep me suffering, yet clinging to life, only to have her way with me later? Or worse?

Finally I saw the sign; the horrible sign that filled me with more dread than if I were staring down the cavernous, toothsome maw of a hungry great white vampire shark. "Salem Sue, next exit!" With trembling hands, I rolled up my windows, turned up my car stereo, and accelerated. My only hope was that the beast was already preoccupied, sacking the desperate town of New Salem for the umpteenth time, and while I might be able to drive through and escape with my life, I did not want to hear the pleas and screams of the innocent as passed them.

And then I saw it! Egad, what a monster. I was still a mile away, but she stood on the hillside like a statue, watching me approach. I knew I was doomed. In vain, I searched for a way to turn around, but there was no U-Turn available on the highway. I resigned myself to my fate. I've had a good life, and these past days of traveling have been nothing short of fantastic. I was prepared to meet my maker, even if it was in the belly of a diabolical flesh-eating giant cow.

But as I kept getting closer, something strange happened. Salem Sue did not seem interested in me. In fact, Salem Sue didn't move at all. She stayed perfectly still, staring off at the traffic heading westbound on I-94. "Surely something is wrong," I thought. The day before, I had learned that a full-grown buffalo eats 35 pounds of grass every day, so, certainly a killing machine the size of Salem Sue must require a constant intake of food just to remain conscious. But no, she just stood there, like a sculpture. I didn't understand it, but I considered myself blessed and drove right on by. But I don't know what to think now. The more I think about it, the less I am sure that she's even a real cow. Probably just some dumb statue.

Is it real or fake? You decide.

North Dakota

My friend Scott is also blogging his trip out west! I might as well ask now, is anyone else that I know traveling west and blogging it?

I decided to skip Voyageurs National Park in northern Minnesota. It looks like you need to take a boat for most of the sights and activities, and I didn't really want to deal with that by myself. So instead, I am headed to Theodore Roosevelt National Park in western North Dakota.

Today was mostly a driving day, and traveling through North Dakota can be ah, uh, a bit monotonous. Fortunately, Alice's sister Kathy had loaned me a few travel books that point out some of the less obvious potential road trip destinations. For example, what you see here is (must be?) the largest stack of tin cans in the world, located in Casselton, ND.

And what you see below is a very rare albino buffalo, seen at the National Buffalo Museum in Jamestown, ND.

By the way, thanks for all the comments you've posted! I get a huge kick out of reading them. Keep 'em coming!

Mammoth Cave, part 2

Step... slip... snap...

I stepped on a root while walking down a hill, and rolled my ankle. Those of you who know me from volleyball, yeah, THAT ankle. Luckily, the area I stumbled onto was flat and dry and had a stream running next to it. I dropped my stuff off and sat on the stream bank, soaking my foot in the cool water for a while. Before the sun went down, I dried off and set up my tent. My first aid kit had an elastic bandage and several doses of Motrin, so I wrapped my ankle as best as i could, popped a few painkillers, and tried to sleep. But sleep doesn't come easy when you're five miles deep in the wilderness, alone, poorly armed, and disabled, not to mention when you're afraid that you won't even be able to make it back on your own. (and you might have to end your road trip prematurely in failure.)

Morning eventually came, and I carefully walked around a bit testing the ankle. I could walk on it, so that was a good sign. I still thought it would take me five hours to make it back to my car, but after I packed up and hit the trail, the ankle started feeling a lot better! I made it back much quicker than I expected. It's still bad, but not nearly as bad as I feared.

I had given up on the idea of doing a cave tour, but once I made it back to the visitor's center, I decided to take the shortest one. Still, I was completely awed. The vast underground world is something you have to see to believe. Pics are dark, naturally, and don't do the experience justice.

I left Mammoth Cave wanting to go back.

Chicago

I found Mike in Chicago! Mike and his wife took me out for a sushi lunch in a Chicago suburb. Mmmmmmmmmm. I am forever grateful.

(Were you looking for Mammoth Cave Part 2? Don't worry, it's on its way.)

Mammoth Cave, Part 1

I decided to celebrate Man's downfall into carnivorous evil by going to Kaelin's in Louisville. Kaelin's claims to be the place where the cheeseburger was first served, in 1934. I'm a pretty big burger fan, so I'm not passing up the chance to eat a "world famous cheeseburger!" Everything tastes great, however, when your diet consists mainly of water, trail mix, and beef jerky, so I'm not sure I can give an accurate review, but I liked it.

Next stop was the Oscar Getz Museum of Whiskey History in Bardstown, KY. I learned several useful facts about whiskey; for example, the term "bootlegging" comes from the practice of hiding flat whiskey bottles in your boots. Also, the word "booze" originated from a brand of whiskey (E. C. Booz Bourbon). Man, did I want a drink after leaving there! It was like the entire place was one giant billboard for alcohol. But there was much driving left, so no Booz for me...

After Mammoth Cave, which I'll get to in a second, I found the National Corvette Museum in Bowling Green. There were models on display from just about every year from 1953 to present, including Calloways, race cars, pace cars, and concept cars. Plenty of great info, including the Vette's evolution, technological innovations, and racing history.

I made it to Mammoth Cave National Park on Saturday afternoon. I decided earlier that my plan would be to hike to a backcountry campsite, spend the night, then hike back in the morning and do a cave tour. So I went to the visitor's center and got the free camping permit, and I ingeniously picked a campsite that was a six mile hike away. Did I mention that it was about 6:00? I needed to hustle, and hustle I did. I managed to almost get to the campsite while there was some daylight left, and then...

TO BE CONTINUED

Did you know...?

Instead of posting pics of the Creation museum displays, let me just share some of the things I learned. (These are exact quotes from the exhibits.)

1. Virtually anywhere we look we find an amazing variety of organisms. There is not enough time, even in billions of years, to get such differences from a common ancestor. The Bible tells us where this amazing variety came from -- created by an all knowing, all powerful, creative God.
2. Fossil layers were formed by Noah's flood (~4,350 years ago) and its aftermath.
3. Dinosaur fossils don't come with tags on them telling us how old they are, where they lived, what they ate, or how they died. We have to figure out that from a few clues we find. But because we never have all the evidence, different scientists can reach very different conclusions, depending on their starting assumptions.
4. The Bible claims the universe had a beginning. Philosophers and scientists rejected that claim for over two thousand years. Now astronomers believe the universe had to have a beginning.
5. What did dinosaurs eat? Before man's fall, animals were vegetarians. In a "very good" creation, no animal would die, so there were no carnivores.
6. The current Colorado River does not cut downward, suggesting that modern erosion cannot explain the Grand Canyon.
7. Basalt lavas dated by different methods give very different dates, suggesting radioactive decay rates were faster in the past.
8. As North America cooled after the flood, larger species replaced smaller species. Present changes are too small and too slow to explain these differences, suggesting God provided organisms with special tools to change rapidly.

Words escape me, but I'm fairly certain that no further commentary is required.