Crater of Diamonds

Alice suggested I check out Crater of Diamonds State Park while I was in Arkansas. This is sort of like one of the places I went to earlier on this trip, the Herkimer Diamond Mine, except that there is a chance of finding REAL DIAMONDS here. And instead of mining via smashing rocks with a hammer, you mine by digging and then sifting dirt. Smashing > sifting, but diamond >> quartz, so I had to give this a try. Not quite sure why Alice suggested I look for diamonds, but that's another story.

So I dig. And I sift. And dig. And sift. And it's HOT, and I've found nothing. So I decide to try the wash and sift method. This is a little better, as it's under the shade, and you get to get very muddy. And it's more productive, as soon I've found a few small, quartz-like pieces. Maybe they're diamonds! I keep at it, and finally I hit the mother lode. A huge, clear piece of ice about a half inch in diameter, with a few nice sharp facets! It's the New Hope Diamond!

Some time later, I bring my haul up to the identifying ranger, and proudly drop the New Hope Diamond, along with the smaller gems I discovered, on the counter in front of him. And then I look on in horror as he takes his metal pick and etches a fat, white scratch across the largest facet of my New Hope Diamond. "That's calcite, calcium carbonate" he coldly says. He tests the others, and continues his cruel monologue, "these are quartz, and these are jasper."

So the New Hope Diamond was actually nothing more than the New Hope Tums Extra Strength Antacid. Oh well! No diamonds to bring home this time.