What happened in Vegas?

The beginning of this post might be a bit dry. If you're not into poker, skip ahead, it gets better :)

I got to Bellagio at about 7:30 PM and immediately went to work, sitting at a 2/5 no-limit table. The first hand I voluntarily played, I was in the big blind. An early position player raised to $25 and was called by a middle position player, the cutoff, and the button. Small blind folded, and I looked down at AKs and made it $125 to go. Everyone folded to the button, who hollywooded for a few minutes and then mucked. So far so good!

A few hands later, I was first to act with JJ. I raised it up to $20, a middle position player and the button called, everyone else folded. Flop was T, 7, 3 rainbow, and I led out $30. MP folds, then the button raises all in to $80. Easy call for me, and he flips over A7s. If my math is correct, I'm about a 4-1 favorite at this point. Turn card however is an ace, and he wins. Easy come, easy go.

Now the story gets good. After about a half hour of break even poker, this impossibly stunning Asian lady with a very skimpy black dress and the kind of curves you only see in Vegas arrives and sits next to me and orders a drink. I immediately proceed to win the next few pots, and then the flirting begins. But strangely enough, it's her flirting with me, not the other way around! As I keep winning, she keeps up the banter, calling me "Table Captain," congratulating me on my plays, offering to buy me drinks, etc. She asked me if I wanted to smoke weed with her at one point (I politely declined), and at another, she asked if I wanted to go to a party with her the following night (I told her I was leaving the next day). Very strange! Meanwhile, my confidence soaring, I'm taking down pot after pot. And she's getting drunker and drunker. By the time I left, she had had at least twelve drinks, and I was up a rather sizable amount!

What didn't occur to me until much later was that my winnings may have been a good deal in thanks to her. The thing is, I was in the 1-seat, and she in the 2-seat. For those who don't know, it means that I couldn't really see her unless I deliberately turned my whole body to look at her. However, the rest of the 21-60 year-old male clientele at the table had her in full view the whole time. So while I got to concentrate on poker, they all got to concentrate on this model or movie star with her overflowing boobies, and why oh why was she has hanging all over a skinny kid wearing dirty hiking clothes and a Duke hat with a huge stack of Bellagio chips in front of him.

So what else happened? Nothing! When I left at about 2:00 AM, she was so drunk I doubt she even noticed I was gone. I walked the strip a little while, ate a $3 hot dog, and went to my hotel room and immediately fell asleep. Nothing happened in Vegas, nothing stayed in Vegas.